I have received tons of messages inquiring how this all started. How did I find out? What were my feelings?
About a month and a half ago, I had my annual exam with my primary care physician. I had asked about my lumpy boobs. She did a breast exam, saw nothing out of the ordinary, and sent me on my way.
A few weeks later, I found a definite marble sized lump while I was doing a self exam. I had Eric feel it and told him I would watch it for a couple weeks to make sure it wasn't ovulation/period related.
A couple weeks following, I went to the same doctor who had given me the all clear. This time, she send me to the Suburban Imaging Breast Center for a mammogram.
The mammogram showed a definite lump. I was then sent down the hall for an ultrasound to see if *hopefully* the tumor was water filled, which would indicate it was a cyst. It wasn't. :( Immediately I was sent for an ultrasound guided biopsy of my tumor and lymph node.
The results would be back the following day, but according to the radiologist that took the samples, "I've been fooled before, but I would be shocked if this came back as anything but cancer." He also mentioned that with how big my lymph nodes are, he is pretty sure that the cancer had already spread out and was circulating through my bloodstream.
You could have knocked me over with a feather. I was in shock, and all alone. I walked out of the office to my car and the radio immediately started blasting "Good Life" by One Republic. Best.song.ever.
I drove home, grabbed my family and jumped in the car to drive to SD. During this ordeal, we had my beautiful cousin's wedding the following day, a trip to Las Vegas and Eric's best friend's wedding the following weekend.
We were about to receive a cancer diagnosis over the phone and not be able to act on it for at least 10 days.
It was brutal. We got the call 2 hours before I had to take Karsyn to my cousin's rehearsal dinner. She was the beautiful flower girl. It was so hard.
I just wanted to get in my car and go home.
The worst part wasn't the cancer diagnosis. No lie, that sucked donkey balls. The hardest part was not knowing where the cancer was currently at. It made for a very long trip.
We now know that I have Invasive Ductal Carcinoma with Lymph Node Involvement. I am also HER2+, which means that my body makes the cancer cells duplicate at warp speed. This is why my type is considered very aggressive and dangerous.
My supportive family raised me up in prayer and great thoughts and we are where we currently are....in a much better place.
This is what it looks like to tell your mom you have cancer. I hope you never have to say those words to your loved ones.
The day after my diagnosis, my mom and her friend Teri McBride joined Tori Simon's Cancer Walk.
The day after my diagnosis with the flower girl. :)
Eric and Cal on our Vegas trip.
As a reminder, FEEL YOUR BOOBS! Know them! Men can also get breast cancer. Early diagnosis is key. I had no family history and I'm under 40. While uncommon, this is obviously not impossible to get.
Educate yourself!
Love you all. :)
Angela, I am soo sorry to hear this! Cancer does fn suck! I am glad that you have a wonderful family to help you get through this time, and I will be praying for you all!
ReplyDeleteMichele Courtney