I would be lying if I said I was happy about being told today that radiation was our best bet.
In a perfect world, Dr Herman would have told me that my percentage for a recurrence would be the same either way.
Unfortunately, It didn't go down like that.
My appointment that was supposed to be two hours turned into three in a hurry.
I was bombarded with information and overwhelmed.
I finally told the radiology oncologist to call my oncologist and figure it out.
They hashed it out via phone while I listened.
Radiation is my best odds. The percentages aren't much different, but they're there. I didn't come this far to quit now because it would be the easiest route. Even a few percentage is more than I started with.
I am considered a T2N1 now and still classified as Stage 2B on that fun ol' cancer scale.
Because of that, we move forward with more treatment. It doesn't really matter how clean the scans are now. We have to base all treatment recommendations on how severe the cancer was when I was first diagnosed.
This is getting exhausting. I feel like all I do every day is go to appointments with different doctors that contradict each other.
Today was pretty effective. I'm thinking the "get my other doctor on the phone and you guys fight it out" plan might be a good route to travel from here on out.
It's fun hearing doctors debate your prognosis.
Because of where my radiation will be and how big my boob expanders are, there is a chance I will have to have my right side deflated during my 28 treatments so that the lasers can get a direct shot to my left side. Yes, you heard that right.
Un-freaking-believable.
Also, because my heart is already wonky, they are going to be very cautious that no radiation beam comes anywhere near it.
They don't have the technology at the radiology center near me....of course, so I quite possibly might be making the trek daily to Minneapolis for my radiation.
Good news is that they're being cautious, bad news is how much more time per day that would take.
I pushed to be mapped today so we would know where to go from here.
All the what ifs had me in tears. I don't care about what ifs. Map me and then just tell me when and where to show up.
Too many words were coming out of his mouth.
It was super frustrating.
The mapping consisted of a CT scan that will show him where my heart is, where they will radiate and will show if I can be radiated at the hospital here.
I also received 4 tiny permanent tattoos today so they can line the lasers up in the same spots every time I go in. Everything is measured to the precise millimeter.
For now, all is at a standstill until I hear from Dr. Herman tomorrow. Hopefully, he's less word-y and calls bearing good news.
Until then......
Sounds frustrating and overwhelming! Sending love your way!!
ReplyDeleteThanks, Lanie XOXO
DeleteHey lady, it does sound frustrating but you got this. Like you said you've come to far to stop now. We're all here for you!!!!
ReplyDeleteThanks, Val! <3
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